As we get closer to Christmas, I am once again reminded of my mother's death on December 25, 2007. It was a sad time for me, but I'm pretty sure I met an angel in the hospital waiting room.
I'll leave out all the details regarding my mom's illness, but my mom was brought to the hospital after she had vomited blood. She fell into a coma and was brought to ICU. Soon after that, the doctors told my brothers and I, there was nothing more they could do for her, so it was decided to put her in hospice care.
While I was at the hospital, I met an older woman in the ICU waiting room. Her husband was also in ICU and was in bad shape. She told me she came from the North country. I kept thinking maybe this woman came from the North Pole (silly me). I saw her a lot in the waiting room and she told me she was sleeping on the couch in the small back room which was connected to the main waiting room. She didn't want to leave her husband, even though her daughter lived nearby. I didn't want to leave my mom, so we both camped out in the waiting room. She slept on the couch in the small back room and I slept on the couch in the main waiting room. Her daughter would come to visit occasionally, but the woman was mostly alone. I struck up a friendship with my angel in the waiting room and we kept each other company at a difficult time. I remember we made each other laugh and it kept our spirits up. On Christmas Eve, her daughter and son-in-law brought us food and we had a little celebration in the waiting room. I just remember the kindness of strangers at Christmas time.
On Christmas Day, I went home to feed the dog and take her out. I went back to the hospital to see my mom on Christmas Day, but I didn't spend the night at the hospital. The next day, on December 26, I got a call from my brother that my mom had passed away during the night on Christmas Day. I felt guilty that I wasn't there when my mom passed, but the hospice worker, told me not to feel guilty and that it was impossible to be with her every second of the day.
I went back to the hospital to tell my waiting room angel that my mom had passed away. But before I did that, I stopped at Kmart. I remember I had seen an angel decoration at Kmart that had caught my eye. Luckily, the decoration was still there. I bought the decoration and brought it to the hospital to give to my angel friend. With tears in my eyes, I told the woman that my mom had passed away during the night. I gave her the angel decoration and she hugged me. I never saw her again after that day, but I always think of her as my angel in the hospital waiting room. I honestly think that in my darkest days and hours, God had sent someone to comfort me.
When death must come at Christmastime,
When death must come at Christmastime,
There is a special grief,
A mourning that must mix with joy,
A pain that must be brief.
There is an anguish underneath
The labyrinth of light
That longs for simple emptiness
To contemplate the night.
But life must bubble on its way
And pleasure be put on,
For neither sorrow nor delight
Is ever left alone.
And, like the Virgin, we must smile
With enigmatic grace
As we receive the fragile gift
That nothing can replace.
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My beautiful mother with my beautiful niece. |